Today I Realized

I recently won third place for this in the county fair I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. 

Today I Realized

Today I realized that I have to learn how to live,

Today I realized that this is okay with me,

For better to learn how to live at 16,

Than to live in the darkness of drugs, alcohol, depression, or self injury.

Today I realized I’m not just a number or another statistic,

Today I realized I am human.

Today I realized that honesty is better,

Today I realized words will hurt me,

Today I realized that is not okay.

Today I realized that my past will define my future,

But will NEVER condemn it.

Today I realized that pain is really just a blessing in disguise,

Today I learned that today I realized.

By Lauren Joyner

Organizational Stuff

Organizing is by far one of my favorite things to do, so I thought it would be fun to share some project links and some links for epic organization apps/websites.

Epic sites and apps:
Springpad:  This is an amazing site for lists, to write reviews for things, compile your favorite photos etc.  My Springpad is ljoyner97.

Catch: Is a great place to keep lists and ideas, it is easy to use and a very well organized app/website.

Goodreads: Is a fabulous way to organize and keep track of what books you have read and what books you want to read. I am in love with this site!  My goodreads: Batgirl.

Awesome project: cornflower blue studio: diy rotating goal list


Sorry for the short post guys, I honestly thought I had more to write on the subject.

LIfe Recently

Wow, the past few weeks have been insane!  First off, I was in the hospital for four days last week for a medication adjustment. This week, I had food poisoning on Monday, then was in a minor car accident on Tuesday! That's why I haven't posted much the last four weeks or so.  Leading up to my medication change, I didn't feel much like writing.  I am very happy to report that my medication is now correct (woo!!!!!).

Several people have been asking for my Facebook and better ways to follow this blog.  I am on Bloglovin and that's probably the best way to follow me. Facebook is another excellent way to keep up with this blog, but also with how I am doing.  I would encourage you to friend me on Facebook and follow me on Bloglovin.  Now for the fun bit!

What I am Reading: Alice in Deadland, this is a lovely version of Alice in wonderland with zombies! Not only does this amazing book have zombies, but it has zombies that do a lot more than a normal zombie would. I definitely recommend this book to anyone that likes zombies and/or political books.

What I am Watching:  BBC's Waking the Dead is about a cold case team. 

What I'm Listening to: Van Halen's 1984 album. Mariana's Trench by August Burns Red. 

Things Making me Smile: Summertime weather, houseplants, and makeup. 

16 Before 17

I've been wanting to make one of these lists since I turned 16 in April and well it's July and I've finally gotten to it!  I'm  super excited to start working on this list. I'm most excited about number two. I've already been doing this and it's super fun. As well as an excellent way to become more comfortable with being alone, it just makes you enjoy your own company.

1) Enjoy having my licence and take advantage of that as much as possible.

2) Date myself; take myself on as many dates as possible.

3) Go electronics free for 48 hours.

4) Get a job making more money.

5) Write a kind loving letter to myself to read in 5 years on my birthday.

6) Pull a FUN all nighter, and sleep all day the next day.

7) Eat an entire dozen glazed doughnuts.

8) Save $500 dollars.

9) Attempt to make sushi.

10) Go to Six Flags.

11) Do water aerobics with the older folks at the Y.

12) Go to a concert.

13) Play kid's board games all afternoon.

14) Have a marathon of kid's movies.

15) Learn how to grill a pizza.

16) Run a 5K.

Spring Goal Review

Well I have completed most of my goals and the ones I have not completed, I still intend to complete asap. Some of these (the art class one) are prime examples of don't make many goals that require more than $20 and gas (that's just my rule, anyone can make it more or less than twenty dollars). The other goals went uncompleted due to laziness and lack of time.

Read 8 Books:  I completed this goal! I read Affirmation Poetry, Frankenstein and several other awesome books!

Plant my Flower garden: I kind of completed this goal. I didn't plant as many flowers as normal nor did I plant my flowers from seed, but I did plant flowers, so goal halfway completed. 

Press Some Flowers: This has been 100% successful goal!  I pressed about a dozen flowers.

Start a Scrap Book: I have without a doubt completed this goal! I've filled nearly an entire scrapbook with pictures, poems, quotes, and mementos. 

Take an Art Class: This is a goal I hope to complete this winter, since I was not able to take one during the spring.

Start a Blog: Well I have clearly managed this and I seem to be starting to gain a decently sized audience.

Finish getting my Driving Hours: I completed this goal with extra hours and successfully got my licence!

Volunteer at the Animal Shelter: I have done volunteer work, but not at the animal shelter, though I plan to drop my application off there this week. 

Go to Five Local Places I've Never Been To: I successfully did this, if you include places I haven't been to in forever, but sadly, I didn't legitimately complete this one .

P.S. I haven't posted yet this week, because I had a lot going on healthwise. 

Summer Goals List

I can't believe it is already summer. Here's a list of my summer goals.

1. Blog twice a week

2. Portfolios- I would really love to put together an art portfolio  as well as a portfolio for my shop to show potential customers.

  

3. Camp out- I've been wanting to camp out on our farm since we moved here, but haven't done it yet.

4. Train for a 5k- I want to train for an Out of Darkness 5K.

5. Read 4 books (at different times) - I didn't reach my spring goal for reading so, I want to finish that as well as this one.

6. Redo a thrift store dresser -  I really want to start fixing up and painting furniture to sell. 

7. Get good at knitting- I have learned how to knit and I would really like to knit something pretty.

8. Sew more- I would really like to make some cool dresses.

9. Get a second job - I would  really like to be making more money by fall, so I can set it aside for the future.

10. Make an inspiration notebook - I've been meaning to make one of these for a while, so I'm pretty excited about this.

Featured product of the week

This is the first of a new weekly installment.  I will be selecting an item from my etsy shop and selling it on here at a reduced price. These coasters can be found on my etsy shop here and  here. I can also do this with any .pdf file you send me, just tell me  you want to order a set of 4. To receive the special price of $14.90, message me on Facebook .

June Photo an Hour

 6:00 a.m. Eating outside and enjoying the flowers.

 7:00 a.m. Enjoying kitten yawns.

 8:00 a.m. Planning out my week.

 9:00 a.m. Taking a walk to wake up after doing math.

 10:00 a.m. Kitten cuteness and literature.

 11:00 a.m. Cleaned desk - ready to tackle more school work.

 12:00 p.m. Dusting some trinkets and antiques.

 1:00 p.m. Leaving to run some errands.

 2:00 p.m.  Enjoying my car bouquet.

 4:30 p.m. Picking up some flowers.

5:00 p.m. Buying pretty flowers.

6:00 p.m. Enjoying my newly planted flowers.

7:00 p.m. I read and then went to bed.

Self-Help Links

In this link post, I have concentrated on some awesome self-help links:

http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/mildmoderate/entry.asp
Get Self Help This is the self-help printout mother load!

Center for Clinical Interventions - This website has great workbooks for everything from managing bipolar disorder to stopping procrastination in it's tracks.


Positive Coping With Health Conditions - Is a self-care manual authored by scientist-practitioners with expertise in issues relating to coping with health conditions. This manual is designed for individuals who deal with health conditions, including patients, physicians, psychologists, nurses, rehabilitation professionals, and researchers. (description from site)     

Learning Commons- Lots of helpful articles, podcasts and printables for students.


Dbsalliance - The depression and bipolar support alliance has lots of helpful information and printables.

Hey guys I just wanted to let you know that this week has been insane for me but I am now back on the blogging bandwagon!!!!!!!

May in my Rearveiw

With longer days, a day in May seems like a month, but the month itself seems like a week, but I have my thoughts together, so here we go.

Favorite photo of the month: This was taken in Maeystown, IL.

Events That Stand Out to Me:  Flooding and tornadoes in St. Louis, MO as well as those  in Oklahoma earlier in the month.

Iron Man 3 came out in theaters!

On a personal note, I got a job!!!

Favorite Links I Discovered/Rediscovered:

Ifred - This is a pretty brilliant website. It has very helpful links and they do a lot to kill sigma related to depression. They also have a great list of help lines and online help support.

imalive - This is an internet emergency support line, all of their volunteers are trained. I think there is a small fee, but completely worth it if you need the help. You can also make a donation to help pay for the volunteers training.

dogshaming  - This website is always hilarious! For those that don't know what it is, people post pictures of their dogs with a sign that says what the dog did, example: destroyed the bathroom.

beautyschoolsdirectory - This website has videos to help those going into cosmetology with helpful tips, scholarship information, and directories to help find schools in your area.

maybelline - They and most makeup companies have great easy to follow tutorials. I now have a new makeup routine thanks to combining several of these tutorials.

My Favorite Read of the Month: Animal Farm - this was by far my favorite book I read this month. I had to read it for school, although it has been on my list for quite a while. The storyline was entertaining and fascinating from a political aspect.

What I Watched: Way more Supernatural than one person should watch in a month. Psych - I actually finished the season of something on time for once.  Doctor Who - as usual I watched a ton of Doctor Who, both new episodes and old ones.

8:00 am: Blog planning. First thing in the morning is my favorite time of the day to plan and write, because I feel refreshed and serene.

 9:00 am  Laying out photos and trying to keep the kitten off the board I was using.

 10:00 am About to have yummy banana bread for breakfast while doing the debate portion of history class.

 11:00 am Writing letters to some good friends, while listening to Of Plymouth Plantation on librivox.org.

 12:00 pm Eating lunch and organizing my close,t while still listening to Of Plymouth Plantation.

 1:00 pm Enjoying my wall of pictures.

 2:00 pm leaving for the gym,it was actually warm enough to wear flip-flops on the way there.

 5:00 pm Grace coming to greet me when I arrived home from the gym.

 6:00 pm Reading one of my favorite blogs loveelycia.

7:00 pm Doing a bit of math.

I then watched some tv and went to bed around 9 pm .

My thoughts on life

I've really been thinking about how in our society, we tend to always have something distracting us.  I know I definitely struggle with that. So I have been brainstorming ways to help me stay more present in my thoughts. 

My favorite idea is to have a TV/music free day, or more than one day.  I am planning on doing this tomorrow and blogging about it on Saturday.  I  realized that I needed to do this on Tuesday when I realized that I haven't been actively in my own thoughts in a while and that it is killing my creativity. So, I really want to craft without telly or music. I think it will be very beneficial for me to do that. I also think I will start sitting with my thoughts for an hour or so a day at least for a while and when I am in the car.

This will also give a nice respite from constantly doing something. My life lately has been more about completing tasks in someways than about being happy, and that is NO way to live life. To me life is first about being happy, second about making others happy, and then everything else.

Photo Essay

Photo Essay: These pictures are from Jefferson Barracks National Cemetery. This has quickly become my favorite cemetery to photography. There is something there that just takes hold of your soul and makes you fall in love with the people buried there, the land, the river that runs by, and every other aspect of this place. A feeling runs over you-- one of absolute peace and serenity.